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Special Things You Can Do For Your Spouse During a Difficult Time

September 25, 2023 By Erin H Leave a Comment

Life has a way of throwing curveballs when you least expect it. What you do during difficult times determines whether you’ll come out of it better or bitter. Things could get even tighter when you have a loved one going through a hard time. Below are three special things you can do for your spouse during a difficult time.

1. Check on Them

Everybody needs a shoulder to lean on, especially during challenging times. Supporting a loved one isn’t a one-time thing. It’s a lifestyle that involves being able to intentionally check in on them whenever you notice a behavior change.

Your “intrusion” may or may not be appreciated initially, depending on past similar experiences or personality differences. However, it’s essential to show genuine concern even when you can’t fathom the gravity of the matter. When you notice something is off, perhaps because your spouse is irritable, angry, isolated, feeling down, or not being their usual self, a simple “Are you okay?” can be a good starting point.

However, this only works if your spouse is more forthcoming with their emotions. It’s not a one-card-fits-all, so if your spouse is not forthcoming with their feelings, find ways of reaching out to them. Try to ease the tension and cheer up your spouse. Reach out to them according to their language of love.

For instance, if your wife loves flowers, go out of your way and buy them to reassure her you are in her corner and that whatever she is fighting, you can fight it together as a team. Win them over, show them appreciation, and you don’t have to wait for special occasions. According to BIGresearch, on Mother’s Day, $1.9 billion worth of flowers is purchased. All these attempts should be targeted at getting to know the source of the problem.

2. Create a Conducive Environment for Dialog

Make yourself a safe space for your partner to pour out their hearts and expose their insecurities without fear of victimization. Be a pillar of strength that your spouse can lean on depending on how they react to stress. Find ways of getting them to share their concerns. Listen and pay attention to both their verbal and non-verbal communication. Be sure to stay within your mandate.

Try not to make the problem about you. Be empathetic to your spouse without losing focus and becoming part of the problem. Help them be part of the solution by appealing to their strength. Remind them of their past victories without belittling their current situation. If your partner needs space, let them know it’s okay and assure them you’re available whenever they need you.

The average American spends about 90% of their life indoors, according to the American Lung Association. Create a comfortable, conducive environment in your home for your spouse. Don’t be overly critical. Be sensitive; listen more and measure your words to avoid jeopardizing a delicate situation. Encourage them to speak more, and if it’s beyond your competence, suggest a suitable alternative. One of the best gifts you can give your spouse is your time.

3. Be Supportive

Small, sweet gestures can be the much-needed break your spouse needs as they take care of their mental health. For example, if your spouse is an automobile enthusiast, it’s healthy to grant them some me-time to work on their car as a stress reliever. Such gestures should be highly welcome since they allow one to blow off steam non-destructively.

Allowing your spouse to engage in a DIY project can be pretty therapeutic. They may choose to paint a room or rearrange furniture. The global market for automotive paint is expected to reach $23,244 million by 2027, up from $18,023.8 million in 2021, according to Astute Analytica.

Take care of your mental health before attempting to help someone. Your well-being is critical in helping your spouse through a difficult time. You need to think objectively, even when your spouse sees you as a villain, without getting offended, which is easier said than done.

Filed Under: Married Money

Are You Teaching Your Kids to Follow Your Financial Habits?

September 18, 2023 By MelissaB 9 Comments

My oldest is 10, and he does chores around the house to earn an allowance.  He works hard, and we’ve taught him to set aside a percentage for investing (10%), for saving (20%), and for giving (10%).  That leaves him to spend 60% of everything he earns.

And spend he does!

He finds it extremely difficult to let his spend money sit and grow so that he can buy something bigger.  Instead, as soon as the money hits his hands, he wants to spend it even if it’s a fairly insubstantial amount and can’t buy him much.

He just can’t seem to save up for the things he wants.

Instead, he’s enticed by advertisements.  He reads the newspaper and magazines to find free catalogs to send away for, and then he wants to spend his money on any little thing.

Teaching Financial HabitsIt’s driving me crazy.

His money, his life.  I should let him spend the money and be disappointed when he has no money to spend later.

Actually, that’s already happened.  When we first moved to Arizona, he saw a 2015 calendar at Costco for $15.  This calendar had scenic landscapes of Arizona and was quite pretty.  I told him to wait because as 2014 came to a close, he could get calendars cheaper.  But he couldn’t wait, and then in December and January, he was disgusted to find how cheap calendars got.

Still, his behavior hasn’t changed.

As a parent, I wonder how much I should interfere.

You see, when I was young, I was just like my son.  I spent every Saturday at the mall, my money burning a hole in my pocket.  I HAD to buy something, even if it was just a pair of socks I didn’t need.  Every week, I walked through the same stores, buying stuff I didn’t need, just like my son buys the stuff he doesn’t need now.

However, my mom never stepped in.  She gave me a wide amount of freedom.  Whatever money I earned was mine to spend how I liked.   She didn’t even ask that I set aside a portion of it for savings.

I was a responsible kid and bought my own car, paid my insurance, paid for gas, and also bought my own clothes.  I think she figured that I was handling my money well, so it was up to me to decide what to do with the rest.

When I was a teenager, my friend and I used our money from our job to go out to eat and see a movie every Friday.  Sometimes we’d go out to eat on the weekdays, too.

What a waste!

Imagine if I had instead invested just a small portion of that in a Roth IRA.  Or if I had saved it to pay for part of my college education.  Maybe I wouldn’t have graduated with $25,000 in student loan debt.

Even now, I have a hard time saving, though I am getting much better.  I’m finally able to stick to a budget and make saving a priority.  It’s taken me 40 years to break bad spending habits that I learned in childhood.  Let’s be honest, getting a hot deal isn’t really a deal if you don’t need the item and it robs you of the ability to save.

I want to teach my son this lesson now, so he can be more financially responsible than I was for many years.  But that lesson is oh so hard to teach.

How much do you guide and interfere in the way your child chooses to spend money?

For More Great Reads, consider checking out Kidwealth.com and kidsaintcheap.com.

Filed Under: budget, Emergency Fund, Financial Mistakes, Saving, ShareMe Tagged With: financial habits, kids money, money habits

How Being a Smart Driver Can Help You Control Your Finances

September 13, 2023 By Erin H Leave a Comment

Side view of an elderly man in glasses driving a car on a sunny summer day

If you find yourself struggling with debt and financial uncertainty, taking control of your finances may feel unobtainable. However, the feelings of discomfort shouldn’t make it feel unessential. One often overlooked aspect of regaining financial stability is becoming a competent and responsible driver. Your choices behind the wheel can have a notable impact on your budget. Consider being a smart driver to gain control of your financial situation.

Lower Insurance Costs

When you’re in a financially precarious situation, every dollar counts. One of the most direct ways to save money is with a reduction of your insurance costs. Responsible driving behavior includes obeying traffic laws and avoiding accidents. If you want to keep your insurance premiums low, you should maintain a clean driving record. The less you spend on your insurance means you have more money to budget.

Focus on Fuel Efficiency and Savings

Fuel expenses are a hefty chunk of your monthly budget. Being a smart driver includes adopting fuel-efficient habits. You may be surprised to find that keeping your tires properly inflated keeps your vehicle fuel-efficient. Driving at a moderate speed and keeping your car maintained also help you save at the gas pump.

Another consideration is adding a turbocharger, which can save a significant amount on fuel. According to AutoDeal, turbochargers can magnify the efficiency capabilities of an internal combustion engine by anywhere from 10% to 30%. Talk to your mechanic about installing a turbocharger in your vehicle to learn more about the costs associated with this service.

Minimize Repair Expenses

Regular maintenance and responsible driving can reduce the likelihood of costly repairs. Expensive repairs can add up quickly and become a significant financial burden for someone requiring control of their finances. If you are looking to extend the life of your car, seek assistance whenever an issue arises with your vehicle.

Reduce Risk

Motor vehicle accidents pose a risk to your physical health and financial stability. According to Just Great Lawyers, there are more than 2.3 million people sent to the hospital from motor vehicle-related injuries each year. Responsible driving can greatly reduce the risk of accidents. To reduce the chances of high medical bills, avoid distractions and stay focused on the road while driving.

Choose Affordable Transportation

If you’re facing financial difficulties, reconsidering your methods of transportation may make all the difference. Owning and maintaining a car can be cost prohibitive. If possible, explore substitute options like carpooling and public transit. These services reduce the financial burden of vehicle ownership.

Be cautious when looking for financial help through a loan. In challenging financial times, some individuals turn to high-risk financial options like car title loans. These loans require your vehicle as collateral to borrow money. According to BankRate, they often come with exorbitant interest rates, as high as 25% to 50%. Take the time to consider all of your options before taking on a loan such as this to avoid falling further into debt.

Smart Budgeting

Creating a budget is primary to reclaiming control of your finances. Being an intelligent driver should be integrated into your budgeting efforts. Allocate a specific portion of your budget for vehicle-related expenses. You want to be sure to include insurance, maintenance, and potential repairs. When you’re able to stay within the parameters of your budget, you can manage your finances more effectively.

Being a competent driver means making responsible choices that align with your financial goals. When you give your attention to actions related to safety and fuel efficiency, you can reduce your expenses. These aspects of being a smart driver contribute to your financial well-being. Even when faced with challenging condition, you can recover control of your finances.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

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