Beating Broke

Personal Finance from the Broke Perspective

How to Overcome Disappointment When Our Financial Role Models Fail Us

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One of the biggest surprises about the whole Suze Orman “Approved Prepaid” Scam/Fiasco, to me, is that Suze Orman is a person who has been a role model, financially, for many people. She has been dispensing her brand of advice for many years, has multiple best-selling books on the subject, and regularly appears on news and talk shows trying to help people lead better financial lives. So, to have someone of that public stature, essentially attack someone I know and trust, led to some amount of disappointment. Disappointment in how she portrayed herself, and, also, eroded the trust that many had in her and her advice. (I should note that I never really cared for her style or advice, but many do and did.)

So, how do we overcome that level of disappointment when someone we trust to give good advice, and to behave in a professional manner, doesn’t?

  1. First and Foremost, remember that the person is human.  People have bad days.  They have lives outside of the limelight, and sometimes that life can bleed over and cause them to do or say things that are uncharacteristic.
  2. Remember that it’s still just advice.  You should be doing your own research and assessing what is right for you in any situation.  Remember when your mom would ask you “If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do the same?” Well, the obvious point she was trying to drive home was that you need to be an independent thinker.  Whenever someone recommends a product, service, or action, you have to determine if you should take that advice, or find an alternative.
  3. Express your disappointment.  Many times, people will disappoint us and not even know they’ve done it.  Tell them why they’ve disappointed you.  Do it constructively, don’t be a jerk.  If they truly meant well, they’ll want to know, and they’ll want to find a way to improve.
  4. Move on.  Take what you have into account, and decide if you can continue to trust the person’s advice.  If you can, let it go, and move on.  If you can’t, let it go, and move on.  (See what I did there?)  Holding a grudge, or reacting negatively won’t help you, and it will reflect poorly on you.

People are disappointed with their role models all the time.  People that we hold in high regard do something stupid, and fall from our good graces.  It’s important to take the lessons that are available, improve upon your filter, and move on.

As I mentioned in the previous post, I don’t think that Suze Orman’s card is, necessarily, a bad card.  I think it’s entirely possible that she created the card with the best intentions, and truly believes that it can be a useful tool for those that use it.  I do think that the marketing for the card is far too broad, aimed at people who shouldn’t be using the card at all.  I do think that she (or whomever is running her twitter account) overreacted to the criticism that was being presented by PT and others.  Suze lost a lot of trust with a lot of personal finance writers over the whole fiasco.  Depending on how the fallout from the whole situation lands, she might get some of that back, she might not.  But, it’s those writers, expressing their disappointment, that might save a few people from using the card when they shouldn’t.  It’s those same writers that may cause Suze to change her course, and improve upon the card based on the recommendations they made.

Disappointment is normal.  We feel it all the time.  How we react to it, and handle it, is what makes the difference.

Have a No Spend Month This Fall to Save for Holiday Gifts

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Have you ever watched your family open up Christmas gifts while mentally calculating how much each gift cost and comparing that against the amount you have in your checking?  Have you dreaded opening the bills in January because you know the credit card statement from holiday shopping will be coming soon and you do not have the money to pay the balance in full?
When my husband and I were newly married and dirt poor, we carefully planned our Christmas purchases to fit within our meager budget.  We didn’t buy many gifts, but the ones we bought were well thought out.  When we went to visit my mom over the holidays, she kept telling us about all of the presents she had bought for us.  There were so many under the tree!  Because we are the only people to buy gifts for my mom because my dad has passed, we started feeling guilty about the few presents we bought her.  Noticing that her bathroom towels were worn, we went out Christmas Eve night and bought her an entire set of 6 new bath towels including hand towels and washcloths with money we did not have.  Then we bought her some jewelry.  We charged everything knowing we didn’t have the money to pay.

50mm HBWOn Christmas morning, she delighted in her presents.  When we opened ours, we were in for a surprise.  She too had bought a few well thought out gifts for us.  But all those extra gifts we found under the tree?  They were leftover t-shirts from a conference some of the professors had hosted at the university where she works.  She bought them for a $1 each.  Each time I or my husband opened another one of those presents that contained a t-shirt, I felt sick.  We had put ourselves in debt to try to make sure our presents were equal to hers, but she had stuck to her financial budget by giving us “filler” presents.  There had been no need to buy those extra gifts on Christmas Eve. . .

We worked like crazy selling off things in our apartment such as textbooks we no longer used so that we could pay off those credit cards used to buy the extra gifts.  On our meager salary, it took us until March.  Thankfully, we have learned our lesson.

If you don’t want to spend the months after Christmas worrying how you will pay off the new debt you just acquired, consider having a no spend month now.  We still have nearly three months until Christmas.  Pick a month such as October or November to drastically reduce your spending.

If you normally spend $1000 a month on groceries, gas, entertainment, eating out, toiletries, etc., decide how much you want to cut that amount.  Maybe you will decide that in October you will only spend $500 a month.  To make up the difference, perhaps you won’t eat out or you will eat from the pantry to use up those groceries that have been on the shelf for awhile.  Maybe you will do something for free as a family rather than catching the latest movie.

By reducing your spending for just 4 weeks, you will be able to come up with a good amount for your holiday gift giving.  If you normally spend $1000, but only spend $500 of that in October, you now have $500 saved for holiday gift buying.  Yes, you sacrifice now, but it will be well worth it when you know that every present under the tree has been paid for.  Best of all, there is no reason to dread the bills in January.  Isn’t that a great way to start the new year?

photo credit: kevin dooley

The Building Credit Fallacy

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Building credit is a phrase that you’ll see around the Internet and anywhere most financial experts talk.  It’s basically the act of getting a loan with easily repayable terms, or piggybacking on someones loan, in order to create a positive record on your credit report and thus increasing (building) your credit score.

But, for many, it’s a fallacy that acts as another trap in the debt cycle.  Here’s the scenario.  You need to build your credit.  So, on the advice of a few friends or experts, you go down to the bank and get a $300 loan.  It’s all they’ll give you, and the interest rate is way more than you should spend.  But, you don’t plan on spending any of the money, so you’ve just got to come up with the payments with the added interest and viola! A shiny new positive mark on your credit report.  Except.  Except that after about 2 months, you get a flat tire.  Or you’re favorite band comes to town.  Or your friends want to go out on the town.  Something comes up and you need some money.  You don’t have any.

credit reportWhere do you get your money?  Why from the loan, of course.  You’re gonna pay it off anyways, right.  So, you’ll just have to scrape together a bit more for the next payment, that’s all.  Except.  Except, you don’t scrape together that money.  You use the rest of the funds to pay the next few months payments, but you come up short.  You still need to scrape a few dollars together to make the last few payments.  How’d this happen?!?  It must have been those parasitic lenders, right?

Not quite.  You did it to your self.  And instead of a shiny new positive mark on your credit report, now you’ve got new delinquencies.  And eventually, maybe a nice new collection note.  All because you thought it would be nice and easy to build your credit.  You fell victim to the fallacy.

It doesn’t have to be that way.  Many people pull this off, but it takes a mindset as well as the money.  If you attempt to do something like this, but you don’t have your whole mind in it, you stand a high risk of ending up with negative marks instead of positive ones.  But, if you’re determined to stay out of debt at whatever cost, you can make it work.  It means you can’t touch that money for anything.  No drinking with friends, no Bieber concert, and no new tires.  If you want to improve your credit score, and you’re in a situation where this is the only solution, you’ve got to be ready to make a few sacrifices.

Take a step in the right direction, take responsibility for your actions, and do the financially sound thing.  Building your credit can be that easy.  It’s not a easy task, but once you’ve built it long enough and high enough, maybe you can continue to build it with a nice used car loan of a couple thousand.

Image Credit: credit report by TheTruthAbout…, on Flickr