Keeping up with the Joneses is bad. We know that. From a financial perspective, we spend a great deal of our time overcoming the green monster called envy in order to keep our lives in some semblance of financial order. We know the Joneses down the street with their big, fancy new SUV. We see them going on long family vacations. And we know the guy that mows their lawn. But, we also know that there’s a pretty high probability that they still owe a ton of money on that SUV. That that family vacation likely was financed through a credit card. Their entire financial life depends on them keeping their well-paying jobs.
Forget the Joneses
I’d like to talk about another family. The Smiths. You don’t know them. We don’t talk about them like we do the Joneses. Why don’t we? Because, outwardly, their lives are nothing to be envious of. They don’t own a big house on a double lot. They don’t drive a brand new Escalade. Their family vacations consist of weekend trips to state parks or trips to visit family a couple of counties over. Outwardly, they may even seem a bit downtrodden. They may seem (GASP!) a bit poor.
Sometimes they are. Sometimes, they are truly victims of their circumstance, or their poor financial choices along the way. But, for every one of those families, there’s at least two that aren’t poor. They have well paying jobs. They have money in the bank. And they occasionally barbeque a steak on the cheap grill they have on their back deck. It’s those Smiths I’d like to talk about.
It’s the Quiet Ones You Have to Watch Out For
Why don’t we know the Smiths? Because we live in a society that is enamored of our celebrity. We hang on every word that that famous athlete, or famous actress says. We try and model our lives after theirs. They live a glamorous life, full of flashing photography, red carpets, and any number of endorsement deals.
Who wouldn’t want to be like that? Short of being famous, we decide that we’ll see how close we can get. The bank doesn’t turn us down for that big house, big car, or vacation to the same beach that the celebrities hang out on. Maybe we’ll even get to see one of them!
But, it’s the Smiths we should know. We should know people who live their lives responsibly within their means. We should know people who live for more than having our fellow neighbors think about how rich we are, and how rich our lives must be. We should be the Smiths. We should be the people who drive the reliable older car without the flashy rims and booming sound system. We should be the people who live in the smaller house that we try and repair ourselves.
Society may push us towards that Joneses sort of lifestyle. After all, what would become of some of the companies if we stopped trying to keep up with the Joneses and stopped buying all their luxury goods? What would the news and tabloids cover if we weren’t constantly buying their rags in order to find out what sort of clothes the princes and princesses of some foreign country were wearing this spring?
Shiny Facades, Crumbling Foundations
All around us, there are Smiths. We don’t notice them, and we rarely get to know them. We’re surrounded by the Joneses, and the shiny facades of businesses and economies that are driven by their reckless spending. But, under those shiny facades is a crumbling foundation. The economy of the world is on shaky ground. We saw just how shaky it really was in 2008. When the housing market crashed, it very nearly brought the entire world economy with it. Luckily, the economy was strong enough at the time to take a beating. It wasn’t strong enough to bounce right back. It’s been a long slog back to where we were. We aren’t even back there yet. There are still parts of the world that are hurting economically.
Imagine, for a moment, if we rebuilt that economy, not on the sands of bailouts and extended unemployment benefits, and instead built it on the bedrock of hard work and frugality that got us where we were in the first place. Imagine if we had seen the folly of our loose spending ways and tightened our belts, stuck to our budgets, and started building an economy that doesn’t shake and quiver at the smallest rise in unemployment, or the slightest miss in an earnings report?
What if, instead of running around willy-nilly chasing the lifestyle of the Joneses, we were calmly working ourselves into the stable economy of the Smiths? What if we all didn’t have wait for our next paycheck to buy gas because our last paycheck went to our mortgage and car payments? What if we were able to fill a tank of gas from the cash in our bank account and know that we still had our emergency funds to help us along should a real emergency come along?
We can. We can bring our spending in line with our earning. We can sell the fancy car that we don’t need. We can downsize our house to something that we can afford. Sure, the dependable used car you buy might not have as much chrome as the fancy one. It might not have the same heated seats. And the house you downsize to might not have a walk-in closet, or a jacuzzi bath tub. I’ll let you in on a little secret. You don’t need them. They’re luxuries. You only think that it’s normal to have those things because the Joneses told you it was.
We should be keeping up with the Smiths.
We can be the Smiths.
I started this blog to share what I know and what I was learning about personal finance. Along the way I’ve met and found many blogging friends. Please feel free to connect with me on the Beating Broke accounts: Twitter and Facebook.
You can also connect with me personally at Novelnaut, Thatedeguy, Shane Ede, and my personal Twitter.
Kurt @ Money Counselor says
Love this post Shane, thanks. You make a great point that the Jones’ get all the attention–since that’s what they’re after–while the Smiths just quietly, sensibly, succeed. Here’s to the Smiths!
Money Beagle says
If the Smiths had money invested in the stock market via a 401(k), IRA or other means, then they got nailed in 2008 even though they were making the right choices. Not many came out scot free during that mess, even if you weren’t part of the problem.
J. Money says
The financial savvy real-life Joneses get a bad wrap! 😉
Ashley @ Money Talks says
Love! I’m a Smith and people don’t get it. I’ve lost friends because they are keeping up with the Jones and think I can’t hang. Oh well, too bad for them!
Tanya says
I try to be a smith but its sometimes hard to do. Great post! A very different view than must of the world.
Carlos @ TheFrugalWeds says
The funny thing about being a Smith is that I don’t even envy the Joneses at all. I do respect their choices, but I am perfectly happy being frugal and saving for the things that I value. Great post Shane!
Travis @debtchronicles says
We uses to have two sets of neighbors – one would spend and spend and spend (Joneses) and one is very responsible with their money (the Smiths). One of the families has moved away, but for a couple of years it was very interesting watching the difference between the two. One just sold their house in the neighborhood which had an interest only loan and is currently looking to break ground on a new house. The other is on track to pay off their current house in the next 5 years.
Crystal says
I’m a Smith/Jones combo without the credit card debt. We don’t spend money that we don’t have, we try not to spend on stuff just because others do, and we invest in our future. But we do spend on splurges because we save for them and want to have fun. I just try to stretch the bucks to cover as much fun as possible, lol.
Jack @ Enwealthen says
Great reminder that appearances can be deceiving.
I’m endlessly amazed whenever I stop to talk to someone about what is really going on in their life. A friend, a family member, a stranger on the airplane. Often the most amazing person, doing the most wonderful things, looks like no one you’d look twice at.
Admire the substance. Ignore the flash.
Shane says
@ Kurt Thanks!
@ Money Beagle Sure, but most of them probably didn’t spiral into bankruptcy because of it either.
@ J Money You just say that so you can keep that Caddy.
@ Ashley I can’t say that I’ve lost friends because of it, but certainly have had some that don’t call anymore when they go out because they know I likely won’t go.
@Crystal I think that if you budget for a splurge, and it fits in your budget, that firmly leaves you in the Smith category.
I just noticed, 7 days later, that I posted this on the 15th. Tax day. It totally wasn’t planned, but how apt. 🙂